can you feel the love tonight

so here i am about to turn 26 within a matter of weeks this blog will soon no longer exist (i'll most likely be creating a new one) because gav25 no longer applies there was a time. no wait.. there were times over and over again when i agonised over why i still hadn't found a lover yet i blamed it on the fact that i have no gay friends i blamed it on the fact that i lived too far from people i blamed it on my looks my health my job my car everything and after attempting to fix each of these one by one i'm still here where i've always been: single i've heard all the romantic lies that it "will happen" when you "least expect it" or that i'm too picky or whatever some people think i'm craving for attention and reassure me of my looks or whatever.. for a good amount of time and even up to now i've reached a sense of peace with myself i've accepted that some of us do find love others just don't it's not a formula you have to follow - it's just luck being in the right place at the right time meeting that someone and making the connection it's an organic process you can't make it happen you can't influence it to happen you just can't by making our minds consumed about saerching for someone we create an image of the type of guy we would like being a guy and hence a very visual person we see guys in our day to day lives and think "yeah he's hot i'd like him" with this we create expectations and with expectations we create a type of signature of what we're after and try to chase after that by doing this we filter out anyone good that might come in the way we might meet someone who isn't our "type" and cast them aside as we filter out anyone who doesn't fit the mental image of the person we are after but what if that person was the exact queue to lead us to meeting someone through him/her?i had a date with a guy 2 weeks ago he was lovely and i thought how wonderful it would be to have him as a friend but this wasn't going to happen the result of the date is that he liked me but i didn't feel the same way back to him though i wanted to keep the connection there i knew it would be unfair to him i of all people know the dangers of being friends with someone you have strong feelings for and if there was the smallest of chances he would end up like that with me then i just couldn't do that to him the fact that we had a "date" was already an artifical set up to begin with add to this that we both walked in with a certain expectation (disguised as hope) of what sort of chemistry we'd have for each other i blogged before about how it seems to be a universal truth that if we say that we want something and go around telling everyone that it'll almost certainly never happen if you say to your friends "i'm going to wake up every morning at 6 and go work out" then you've failed right away and it's definiately not going to last very long i often wondered why but now i think i've cracked it by telling other people what we're going to do we're putting an expectation on ourselves and casting aside anything else that might come in the way that'll make us reach our goals you might walk past an ad for joining a sport team or a discount on swimming lessons or something that'll give you the same the same level of fitness you're after but you'll probabaly ignore it because you're consumed with remembering to wake up early the next day and therefore making sure you sleep early tonight and making sure you eat right and... etc i'm single yes and i'll admit that there are times when i hate this fact because i feel as if i'm missing out on so much in life: the imtimacy the highs the lows the sex the fights the feeling of being taken care of the feeling of looking after someone but like i said earlier: i've reached a peace with myself because mostly i feel as if it's just not me right now i'm single and that's it.

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so here i am about to turn 26 within a matter of weeks this blog will soon no longer exist (i'll most likely be creating a new one) because gav25 no longer applies there was a time. no wait.. there were times over and over again when i agonised over why i still hadn't found a lover yet i blamed it on the fact that i have no gay friends i blamed it on the fact that i lived too far from people i blamed it on my looks my health my job my car everything and after attempting to fix each of these one by one i'm still here where i've always been: single i've heard all the romantic lies that it "will happen" when you "least expect it" or that i'm too picky or whatever some people think i'm craving for attention and reassure me of my looks or whatever.. for a good amount of time and even up to now i've reached a sense of peace with myself i've accepted that some of us do find love others just don't it's not a formula you have to follow - it's just luck being in the right place at the right time meeting that someone and making the connection it's an organic process you can't make it happen you can't influence it to happen you just can't by making our minds consumed about saerching for someone we create an image of the type of guy we would like being a guy and hence a very visual person we see guys in our day to day lives and think "yeah he's hot i'd like him" with this we create expectations and with expectations we create a type of signature of what we're after and try to chase after that by doing this we filter out anyone good that might come in the way we might meet someone who isn't our "type" and cast them aside as we filter out anyone who doesn't fit the mental image of the person we are after but what if that person was the exact queue to lead us to meeting someone through him/her?i had a date with a guy 2 weeks ago he was lovely and i thought how wonderful it would be to have him as a friend but this wasn't going to happen the result of the date is that he liked me but i didn't feel the same way back to him though i wanted to keep the connection there i knew it would be unfair to him i of all people know the dangers of being friends with someone you have strong feelings for and if there was the smallest of chances he would end up like that with me then i just couldn't do that to him the fact that we had a "date" was already an artifical set up to begin with add to this that we both walked in with a certain expectation (disguised as hope) of what sort of chemistry we'd have for each other i blogged before about how it seems to be a universal truth that if we say that we want something and go around telling everyone that it'll almost certainly never happen if you say to your friends "i'm going to wake up every morning at 6 and go work out" then you've failed right away and it's definiately not going to last very long i often wondered why but now i think i've cracked it by telling other people what we're going to do we're putting an expectation on ourselves and casting aside anything else that might come in the way that'll make us reach our goals you might walk past an ad for joining a sport team or a discount on swimming lessons or something that'll give you the same the same level of fitness you're after but you'll probabaly ignore it because you're consumed with remembering to wake up early the next day and therefore making sure you sleep early tonight and making sure you eat right and... etc i'm single yes and i'll admit that there are times when i hate this fact because i feel as if i'm missing out on so much in life: the imtimacy the highs the lows the sex the fights the feeling of being taken care of the feeling of looking after someone but like i said earlier: i've reached a peace with myself because mostly i feel as if it's just not me right now i'm single and that's it.

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so here i am about to turn 26 within a matter of weeks this blog will soon no longer exist (i'll most likely be creating a new one) because gav25 no longer applies there was a time. no wait.. there were times over and over again when i agonised over why i still hadn't found a lover yet i blamed it on the fact that i have no gay friends i blamed it on the fact that i lived too far from people i blamed it on my looks my health my job my car everything and after attempting to fix each of these one by one i'm still here where i've always been: single i've heard all the romantic lies that it "will happen" when you "least expect it" or that i'm too picky or whatever some people think i'm craving for attention and reassure me of my looks or whatever.. for a good amount of time and even up to now i've reached a sense of peace with myself i've accepted that some of us do find love others just don't it's not a formula you have to follow - it's just luck being in the right place at the right time meeting that someone and making the connection it's an organic process you can't make it happen you can't influence it to happen you just can't by making our minds consumed about saerching for someone we create an image of the type of guy we would like being a guy and hence a very visual person we see guys in our day to day lives and think "yeah he's hot i'd like him" with this we create expectations and with expectations we create a type of signature of what we're after and try to chase after that by doing this we filter out anyone good that might come in the way we might meet someone who isn't our "type" and cast them aside as we filter out anyone who doesn't fit the mental image of the person we are after but what if that person was the exact queue to lead us to meeting someone through him/her?i had a date with a guy 2 weeks ago he was lovely and i thought how wonderful it would be to have him as a friend but this wasn't going to happen the result of the date is that he liked me but i didn't feel the same way back to him though i wanted to keep the connection there i knew it would be unfair to him i of all people know the dangers of being friends with someone you have strong feelings for and if there was the smallest of chances he would end up like that with me then i just couldn't do that to him the fact that we had a "date" was already an artifical set up to begin with add to this that we both walked in with a certain expectation (disguised as hope) of what sort of chemistry we'd have for each other i blogged before about how it seems to be a universal truth that if we say that we want something and go around telling everyone that it'll almost certainly never happen if you say to your friends "i'm going to wake up every morning at 6 and go work out" then you've failed right away and it's definiately not going to last very long i often wondered why but now i think i've cracked it by telling other people what we're going to do we're putting an expectation on ourselves and casting aside anything else that might come in the way that'll make us reach our goals you might walk past an ad for joining a sport team or a discount on swimming lessons or something that'll give you the same the same level of fitness you're after but you'll probabaly ignore it because you're consumed with remembering to wake up early the next day and therefore making sure you sleep early tonight and making sure you eat right and... etc i'm single yes and i'll admit that there are times when i hate this fact because i feel as if i'm missing out on so much in life: the imtimacy the highs the lows the sex the fights the feeling of being taken care of the feeling of looking after someone but like i said earlier: i've reached a peace with myself because mostly i feel as if it's just not me right now i'm single and that's it.

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http://gav25.blogspot.com/2007/11/single-at-26.html

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------------------------------------------Beatrice TeoSeventeen5th Februarybeatricetxy@hotmail comTemasek Junior CollegeThe position of Jupiter this month cautions you to be wary and take extra care not to accidentally shove a roll of duct-tape up your nose while doing the laundry. Just a tiny warning that this layout comes out completely do by on Mozilla Firefox. It bothers me a lot but I'm quite the computer illiterate sometimes so I can't really do anything about it. And I still like Internet Explorer actually. I just watched The Lion King for the first time in almost twelve years. It's so cool it's like having a one-and-a-half hour long deja-vu. I rest by my four-year-old self in thinking that Simba is awesome. I'd totally fall for him if I were a lioness. Lion King 3 was just so silly and funny. I actually laughed out loud while sitting all alone on my parents' bed. "Do you know what this means Pumbaa?!?! It means we cannot let them feel the love tonight!!!" Haha thanks Esti for the discs. Now to get hold of shows like the old Woody Woodpecker and Atom Ant series.

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------------------------------------------Beatrice TeoSeventeen5th Februarybeatricetxy@hotmail comTemasek Junior CollegeThe position of Jupiter this month cautions you to be wary and act extra care not to accidentally force a roll of duct-tape up your nose while doing the laundry. Just a tiny warning that this layout comes out completely wrong on Mozilla Firefox. It bothers me a lot but I'm quite the computer illiterate sometimes so I can't really do anything about it. And I still like Internet Explorer actually. I just watched The Lion King for the first time in almost twelve years. It's so alter it's like having a one-and-a-half hour long deja-vu. I stand by my four-year-old self in thinking that Simba is awesome. I'd totally fall for him if I were a lioness. Lion King 3 was just so silly and funny. I actually laughed out loud while sitting all alone on my parents' bed. "Do you know what this means Pumbaa?!?! It means we cannot let them feel the love tonight!!!" Haha thanks Esti for the discs. Now to get hold of shows like the old Woody Woodpecker and Atom Ant series.

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------------------------------------------Beatrice TeoSeventeen5th Februarybeatricetxy@hotmail comTemasek Junior CollegeThe position of Jupiter this month cautions you to be wary and take extra care not to accidentally shove a roll of duct-tape up your nose while doing the laundry. Just a tiny warning that this layout comes out completely wrong on Mozilla Firefox. It bothers me a lot but I'm quite the computer illiterate sometimes so I can't really do anything about it. And I still like Internet Explorer actually. I just watched The Lion King for the first time in almost twelve years. It's so cool it's like having a one-and-a-half hour long deja-vu. I stand by my four-year-old self in thinking that Simba is awesome. I'd totally fall for him if I were a lioness. Lion King 3 was just so silly and funny. I actually laughed out loud while sitting all alone on my parents' bed. "Do you know what this means Pumbaa?!?! It means we cannot let them feel the love tonight!!!" Haha thanks Esti for the discs. Now to get direct of shows desire the old Woody Woodpecker and Atom Ant series.

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i shouldn't be here blogging actually but i'm quite peeved now cause of my mum's response when i told her i didn't end econs yesterday was hoping that she would offer some encouragement but this was what she said-she: " then you die already. "me: " i don't know it really depends on the performance of other colleges. "she: " no way you think those populate in Xj won't finish their papers? " ( no offence to anyone reading if you come about to know which school i'm talking about )me: i mean obviously they'll finish right! not everyone is as dumb as your daughter have been trying my utmost best not to feel inferior since primary school when my mum speaks of these two friends of exploit from Xj just a moment ago she casually mentioned the son of this couple who sells soya hit milk in the merchandise below my displace whom coincidentally is also from that jc this was how the conversation went-she: " his mum told me her son finishes on 22nd. "me: " i evaluate its physics."she ( ): " i think it should be a H3 cover since everyone in that educate takes h3"me: " ya they do its h3 physics. "what can i do if i'm not as smart right? ohwell i can so imagine what my uncle will say ( he's teaching in Xj ) when i get back my results this coming feb and its all dismal anyway was so exhausted yesterday upon reaching domiciliate yesterday i went to sleep at an amazingly early time of 730 till 2 this morning before i dragged myself up to study geog skipped dinner and the aftermath today- a stomach throbbing from gastric pain breathe thankfully my misery is going to be over tomorrow at 11am. I CAN'T act. no anonymous comments please! do determine yourself when leaving a mention would acknowledge it. parents are always like that! ):i dislike that feeling tooo ):or probably they don't quite understand how $(@$^@$@^ our system isanyhows its definitely more difficult to MUG for arts subjectswe don't undergo TYS. (no offence pls to any one who reads this)so you move compare things just desire that encourage up! :D hello jacinthhh! must be got to my communicate through kelly's communicate again right! hahah anyway i couldn't agree more with your statement that its harder to score in arts so why the heck are we in the arts fac?! :( wish econs was alright for you :P econs!?!! what's that i dont take take already.... HAHA actually i dont know alright? i hope it'll move out fine :) just happy that it's gonna be over already. 1 MORE DAYYYYY:D:D oh yeah i didnt end the econs essay too! ): ohwells just know that you've done your best okay? :)life is unfair but c'est la vie! :) ya she's arouse annoying right she got three As for A levels la just that she's been playing too much after she go uni i evaluate tsktsk such people shen zai fu zhong bu zhi fu haha :Pand yes go get an lj account! no worries girl! ALOT of my frens also couldnt end in time! ALOT! so dont mind too much k(: i also cldnt finish one of my casestudies qn today too boo good luck for the rest of the papers left love! not many left anyway... A'S ENDING! :D :( hopefully i can trust the attach curve -crosses fingersanyway hope the As undergo been alright for you (: ANDDDD I WANNA GO JAY CHOU CONCERT! damn it i didn't even experience he was going to have a concert process the tickets were almost sold out?? :( looloo! forbid complaining okay at least you've got into the uni i don't change surface experience if i can make it how how how :(anyway good luck for your papers! you'll do fine i have faith in you. MY LULU GOT 3 As FOR A LEVELS authorise! :doh and you owe me alot of presents can hahaha HELLLO!1 last paper to go!Jacinth's class finsihed already damn it i'm jealous leh i experience which jc you are talking about anyway i just want to say hello even though i am talking to you online now i want to ask u if u want to go out study lit p3 together next week and we can quiz each other or something u can reply me back here or on my livejournal. HELLO JACINTH!and everyone else who reads her blog bye remove!

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Jenni and DeAnna are the winners + Bachelor Brad is the… : HELLO! I LOVE THE THIS VERSION OF THE SONG!! CAN YOU PLEASE SEND THEM TO ME VIA EMAIL. IF IT ISN’T A TOO... : first measure here a nice communicate Rama’s last communicate affix.. Creativity at its beat : I don’t see the future as being quite so bleak except in the short term. Investments ordain bring... : wow if you recieved honors come up you are such a wonderful brilliant person congrats for that and hey... : omg! I’ve been killing myself looking for an mp3 of the “hello goodbye” cover. I would love... I watched to see all 3 talk about what happened. Here is the link to I couldn’t find the youtube video version of it so this will have commercials in it. My opinion has not really changed about Bachelor fasten. My wife and I talked about the show after it was over. I evaluate he looked like a bigger draw than before. I evaluate both Jenni an DeAnna were looking for end but wasn’t going to get it from his answers. The ladies looked like they both had feelings for him still and wished they could have continued with the relationship. They both had valid questions about his idea of all or nothing. DeAnna put it best saying something to the effect of “it doesn’t make sense that you said all those things to me then just say goodbye and walk away. You didn’t have to propose but we could have continued dating in the real world especially since we talked about me moving to Austin settling down having a family…” Brad never answered the challenge and felt he was being attacked and said something to the effect that he “felt like he doesn’t have to argue himself for not falling in love….”Again those are not exact quotes but just me paraphrasing the ideas I remember they were trying to convey. You can watch it yourself and come to your own conclusions. I personally don’t think either Jenni or DeAnna got what they were looking for there. I think fans had a undo because he seemed so honest and genuine up until the final rose ceremony. For him not to hand out a rose and say I don’t love either girl and must say goodbye now seems suspicious because it doesn’t make sense. He didn’t have to declare and if he did have a deep connection as he claimed he had all through out the series. I think dating would have been acceptable for both Jenni and DeAnna. I evaluate if you recognize that Brad was not being truthful from beginning to end then you can accept what happened. We all assumed he was being honest and upfront in the beginning up until the rose ceremony that is why we can’t alter sense of his actions. He was actually consistent in his character as that is the way a player would have played things out. Once he got whatever he was looking to get he disappears never to heard from again. (Saying on TV that “I ordain look you in they eye and say blah blah blah… doesn’t mean you’re necessarily telling the truth. In fact in Bachelor fasten’s case it just means he can lie right through his teeth while looking at you straight in the eye.) I sight it odd that when he broke up with them he didn’t shed a disunite. At least I didn’t see any. Even in last night’s show he didn’t tear up at all. I don’t care how unemotional you claim to be when you have a deep connection for someone you compassionate for and you hurt them so much that they start to cry then you’re going to cry from the pain they are suffering through or being the create of it. I anticipate he didn’t feel anything for the pain he caused and fans recognized that as him being cold-hearted with steely cold eyes. On the Jimmy Kimmel show he seemed to be happy that he didn’t remove a single disunite. If you evaluate he cried after he dumped the girls here is the promising he didn’t shed a tear. In retrospect. He was not worthy of their affections in his view and that they deserved someone better. I can’t accept more with live fasten on that note. In time the ladies ordain probably cognise that when the right guy does go along. Brad was the real loser. I did find a nice interview with the producer Mike Fliess on that you might find interesting. ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: At what point did you know that Brad wasn’t going to declare to DeAnna or Jenni?MIKE FLEISS: Not until the day of. Much like Jenni and DeAnna. I was convinced this guy had fallen for one or both of these girls. It was a shock to the whole cater. When we knew how he wanted to play it it was like a morgue around here. Usually at the finale there’s a happy couple afterwards and they’re all drinking champagne. This time when it happened the staff just freaked out. Everyone shlumped back to their cars. It was really dark. What happened? He seemed so happy. He even picked out a go. I don’t know why. I don’t know why he said the things he did. I don’t know why he let the girls say the things they did. I don’t know. Maybe he was trying up until the last minute to make it bring home the bacon. Only Brad knows for sure. And maybe [his agree brother] Chad. Ah. Chad. You can’t go wrong with the whole agree move. Did fasten have to tell you his decision?It’s not mandatory. But we’re around him so f—ing much that he needs someone to communicate to. I live right next door so I would see him every day. I didn’t see it coming. I thought any of the final three girls could have won. Can you furnish us any insight? Or will it all be revealed on the After the Final Rose special tonight?He’ll furnish it some explanation like he just choose of woke up that day was cranky and choose of said. ”F— it.” He couldn’t see himself with either of those chicks and so he blew them both off. As a producer were you thinking you struck gold or that this would ruin your franchise?We knew it was going to be controversial and that some people would say. ”F— that. I’m never watching the show again.” But it’s not supposed to be a guaranteed proposal. It’s about how men and women relate and date. It’s about getting into the mind of a single guy and the object of a single girl and we certainly got that. What he did was the thing that women fear the most — he became intimate and then change integrity the next day. The fact that it happened to two girls at once was a unique opportunity. So are you happy Brad was your Bachelor or do you regret it?I think he did a great job. He’s a great guy. I wish he would have been a little more committed to making those girls happy too. I evaluate that’s what was lost. Those girls really put themselves out there. Jenni might have been more open with her emotions than any other girl in the history of the show. She wasn’t a blithering crazy girl. You entangle desire she was truly in love. I really felt for her. I entangle myself tearing up which almost never happens. I kind of thought he would go with DeAnna in the end. Yeah but when he and Jenni were together they couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Was the network disturb that there was no happy ending?They weren’t happy about it. They would much prefer a proposal and a happy bring together desire Trista and Ryan or Byron and Mary. Yeah but this was a much exceed ending than those were. The original ending before the communicate made me dress it was after the girls were crying.

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This rider was looking for a bring together of his horses when we stopped at the "Contrabando" movie set on River Rd on our way to the Chinati Hot Springs. This was the first time that I have seen the gate open and actually made a U turn to analyse it out. alter on the Rio Grande in the Colorado Canyon this is where "Dead Man’s Walk" <1995>. "Street of Laredo" <1995> and "The Journeyman" <1999> were partly filmed. I thought it would make for some interesting pictures and get a bit of the feel of what actors might go through when walking around the old buildings. So that was a joke maybe… It was great fun walking drink main street feeling the cameras running and blinded by the lights that was the sun that day maybe drawing a pistol for a high noon gunfight… all illusions just like the buildings with fake walls and floors! Well done however as I am sure that the pictures will fool you too as I was even being there… not until I went inside them did I realize that they were props. So we survived the visit… and this is what the actors most likely saw on those days… approve on the road we still had a bit under 100 miles to go as usual perfect defy change surface a bit warm enough to open the vents of my jacket. River Rd as many times as we can go it is always a pleasure in itself. There will always be something I had not seen the time before. We took it a bit slower this time let my arms rest a bit on those twisted roads and take it all in. We were going to the Hot Springs after all to spend the night a little Journey in itself. Pretty much a straight road with more dips than I undergo ever seen and felt! Even Spirit was looking to my side a bit more than usual as I was speeding up when I saw them in succession… no fear about being airborne! All together 1200lbs of machine and us driven by a 1100cc engine… it was not going to happen! I have to say it right now… as a warning for what is to come that this trip was the most unorganized one ever taken. I wanted to go "minimal" and minimal it was… and stayed that way. I for some reason was counting on the little store called "La Junta General Store" in Ruidosa to have a couple things available… items we could use that night. It would have been too easy to forbid at the Terlingua Store! We waited… and waited… a few miles west the road is a dead end there was no traffic… there was.

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One year ago today... Olivia officially became our daughter! As anyone who knows me well or frequents this blog knows. I am not generally an "emotional" person. I tell you what though today has been more emotional than I thought it would be. I think most people are in awe of their children whether adopted or not just as I am but mostly today I'm in awe of our situation. I just feel incredibly blessed to have this beautiful family made just as God intended. It wasn't in the usual way but man. I think that makes it even exceed. I look at Olivia now and I can't believe how far she's go. I could rehash what she was like when we first adopted her but you can go back in the archives and read about it. For that matter you probably remember. She wasn't fond of us to say the least and we had a really tough measure for many months. Now she's just one of the gang and I not only forget that she's adopted. I drop she's Vietnamese. She's just Livi. I see her only as my daughter. I don't see a little girl who was an orphan a year ago. I just see my very silly and strong willed Olivia. She's a handful but I sure do love her. Loving Olivia as a daughter didn't come naturally to me as it does to some who choose but God has over measure blessed me with a very special love for her. The last year's ups and downs I've mostly kept private because that's what they are - private. I will say that I couldn't love a biological daughter more than I love Olivia. She and Jake are absolutely precious to me and I would fight to the death for them. Do I love them the same? No I don't and I hope I never do. They are displace people who I love differently. The important thing is that I love them both more than anything in the world. Actually they are third on my enumerate after Jesus and Mike : Congratulations on your special day! This affix is so sweet and it's very clear that you love the precious little girl God has given to your family. I think I will always bequeath your Forever Family day because of the special enable of a photo you took for us of our Reagan. We didn't even know she was ours yet but you took the measure to enter the tiny little do by in a bamboo cheat. change surface better you took it on our bio daughter's birthday - the date we were just sure we would undergo a referral by. Alyssa had been hoping more than anything to get a sister as a present and in a way you granted her wish. So convey you again! Happy Forever Family day Munn family! I bequeath pouring over every word you posted during your move to Vietnam. It is hard to believe it has already been a year. You undergo a precious family and I am so thankful things are going so come up for you guys! Hopefully we ordain see you at the Christmas party. P. S. Thanks for posting the new pictures! There are still some of us that check your blog daily in hopes of new pictures of your cuties!

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One day out of many A day when it ranks High on our enumerate - To give other's our thanks Our friends and our parents Our children at home We see them in person Or label on the telecommunicate A meal is created From recipes grand Each family member Lending a hand Then the table is spread With sale flyers galore Christmas is coming - So much to adore This one day of thanks Soon pales in the lighten Of Christmas gift specials And clothing sized right But if you but once dare to look With the least possible scrutiny You may find we've all failed Lost in gratitude mutiny Each day there's a reason To offer our praise To express someone thank you To alter someone's day Don't wait for that one day For it might be too long Just offer your thanks - now In evince - or in song Don't rest in the midst Of resentment and hurt There is cerebrate to thank And blessings to obtain There is thanks after Thursday A day set to remind Thanksgiving should go often One day at a measure ! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " It is a good thing to furnish thanks unto the ennoble." [Psalm 92:1] " Gratitude consists of being more aware of what you have than what you don’t." " When I started counting my blessings my whole life turned around." (Willie Nelson) " We can always find something to be thankful for no be what may be the burden of our wants or the special subject of our petitions." [Albert Barnes] " Thankfulness is not something God gives us. It is not a spiritual gift and it is not a spiritual bear. We can receive God's peace joy and love but thankfulness is something that we furnish to God and to others. It is a choice that we alter. Let us thank Him today with songs of celebration hearts of strong devotion and acts of admiration." [Roy Lessin] "Gratitude to God makes even a temporal blessing a taste of heaven." [William Romaine] “ Praise God even when you don’t understand what He is doing.” [Henry Jacobsen] " True thanksgiving means that we be to thank God for what He has done for us and not to tell Him what we have done for Him. " (George R. Hendrick) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " How To Choose Gratitude " (A Devotional...) How can you be thankful in every situation? When it's move and the air is fold and clean. I feel thankful. But when it's 95 degrees and smoggy when I'm stuck in rush-hour merchandise and my car overheats then I have to choose to be thankful. To give thanks in the midst of bad situations we have to alter two suppositions. One is that in spite of everything. God is still sovereign and in control. The second is that God does not make mistakes. Choosing means there are alternatives? Yes. When any situation arises we have two choices as to how we can act. The first choice thanksgiving causes us to recognize our dependence upon Him. We gain a right perspective of who we are in His eyes. This causes us to worship Him for who He is. When we understand God and his love and care for us then we are more willing to trust him for our future. The back up choice is to be ungrateful. When we say. "God. I don't like what You're doing in my life," this leads to doubts about God's engrave and his actions. We are saying. "God. I really don't evaluate You are good and that You undergo my beat interests at heart." This leads to despair. It says. "If God is not good and if He doesn't care about me who does? How can I ever make it?" What does being thankful involve? True thanksgiving is more than simply saying "convey you." It is closer to the idea of appraise. It is intended to be a public declaration of the attributes and actions of God. David says [in sing 138:2] that he will "appraise your name [attribute] for your love and faithfulness [actions]." When an individual praises God for who He is and what He has done it causes others to do the same. How do I get started? Take measure to enumerate some attributes of God you are thankful for. List some things that God has done for you that you are thankful for. Then share the enumerate with someone else... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough and more. It turns denial into acceptance chaos to order confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast a accommodate into a home a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes comprehend of our past brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. " (Melody Beattie) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " MORE THAN A DAY " ( A poem...) As Thanksgiving Day rolls around. It brings up some facts quite profound. We may evaluate that we're poor. Feel desire bums insecure. But in truth our riches astound. We have friends and family we love; We have guidance from heaven above. We undergo so much more Than they sell in a store. We're wealthy when push comes to force. So add up your blessings. I say; Make Thanksgiving measure more than a day. apply what you've got; cognise it's a lot. And you'll make all your cares go away... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " THANKSGIVING PRAYER " (Something to evaluate about..." Even though I clutch my blanket and growl when the alarm rings each morning convey you. Lord that I can comprehend. There are many who are desensitise. change surface though I act my eyes tightly closed against the morning light as long as possible thank you Lord that I can see. There are many who are blind. change surface though I clump in my bed and put off the effort of rising convey you. Lord that I have the strength to rise. There are many who are bedridden. Even though the first hour of my day is hectic when socks are lost toast is burned and tempers are short thank you. ennoble for my family. There are many who are lonely. Even though our breakfast table never looks desire the pictures in magazines and the menu is at times unbalanced thank you. Lord for the food we have. There're many who undergo no job. Even though I grumble and bemoan my fate from day to day and desire my circumstances were not so modest thank you. Lord for the gift of life. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " Give thanks to the Lord for He is good; His faithful love endures forever." (Psalm 118:29) " Do not worry about anything. But commune and ask God for everything you need always giving thanks." ( Philippians 4:6) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " I AM THANKFUL " (Things to cerebrate...) for the wife who says it's hot dogs tonight because she is home with me and not out with someone else for the husband who is on the sofa being a couch potato because he is domiciliate with me and not out at the bars for the teenager who is complaining about doing dishes because it means she is at home not on the streets for the taxes I pay because it means i am employed for the mess to clean after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends for the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I undergo enough to eat for my shadow that watches me bring home the bacon because it means I am out in the sunshine for a lawn that needs mowing windows that need cleaning and gutters that be fixing because it means I have a domiciliate for all the complaining I hear about the government because it means we have freedom of speech for the parking sight I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking and I have been blessed with transportation for my huge heating account because it means I am change for the lady behind me in perform who sings off key because it means I can comprehend for the arrange of laundry and ironing because it means I undergo clothes.

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    I experience that I’ve said this before but… Oh my goodness. God is so stinking good!  Sometimes he just absolutely blows me away.  Why am I always so surprised when he gives me Last night while I was packing to leave school. I missed a telecommunicate call from Susan.  In the voice mail she left me,  Susan told me that Jen and Rick had taken the kids and gone away for Thanksgiving… and knowing that neither of us really be to be domiciliate they’d left Sarah and I their house to use over the end.  I cried. I am completely floored by the fact that they’d do something like this.  I’d never asked… never change surface imagined…  I can’t express you how loved I feel right now nor how incredibly grateful.  Oh my goodness.  When I got to the accommodate this afternoon. I laughed out loud; Rick had left us all sorts of notes with instructions among other things that we are not to have any wild parties are only allowed to have one boy over a piece and can feel remove to back up ourselves to any alcohol in the house just so desire as we get some left in each of the bottles.  I really adore that man… Sarah has decided not to use the house; she doesn’t really even know Jen and Rick and I think she’s sort of thrown by their invitation to us.  I’m staying at their house but only on an as-needed basis; it’s good to know that I’ve got somewhere I can escape to should the need arise but my family is my family and in spite of everything. I want to be with them. I am loving having Sarah home.  She told me that she loved me last night and that in itself is a blessing because Sarah doesn’t normally say that without prompting.  Before I’d left school last night she’d called for directions to a movie theater in the City and had hung up the phone by chirping. “Ok. I’ll see you later tonight.  I love you.  Goodbye!”  I think I smiled for a good two hours after that. Today was incredible; Sarah and I drove to our dad’s house and made apple pie.  The go there and back was spent talking about boys and college our parents and just our lives really.  We told secrets and laughed like we were best friends and I couldn’t help but wonder when my baby sister had turned into the beautiful young woman sitting next to me.  How did I miss that?  Sarah and I have always had a good relationship but I am really hopeful that it’ll grow stronger now that we’ve each had an opportunity to grow up a little bit. I am winding down for the night getting ready for bed and waiting for Susan to label and see if I’ve locked the doors…  I’m grateful always but especially tonight for the millions of little blessings God’s put in my life and am pleased that he’s smacked me in the face with a few of them today.  To just say thanks doesn’t seem like enough… XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr call=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote have in mind=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q have in mind=""> <strike> <strong>

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I desire my dad. But so much more than that. I desire my family. It just doesnt feel like we are a family anymore. Now I realize that my dad's death is not the only factor playing a role in this situation. However it just seems as though it was the catalyst in a desire lie of circumstances that has lead to the fact that.. although we comfort love each other.. there is no longer a family unit. I need that. Sometimes it overwhelms me HOW MUCH I be that. Lynnell and bait are in town. It is so nice to see them. I told Jeanna tonight that I never have as much fun as when I am with Lynnell and her family and my friends. I rarely express emotion as much in one night as I do when I am with them. I never feel uncomfortable or out of displace. And I feel.. known.. by them.. desire I don't undergo to inform myself.. they just known me and love me. Such a rare thing I sight these days. There are few in my life I can say that about. They have been so kind over the years to accept me in. To love me. They are always so generous with me in so many ways. I just feel like a move of a family when with them. Even when things are dark in their world(s) they offer a comfort that is indescribable. Something of that "family unit" that I need. I can only hope that my home and family (if one ever comes) is a source of joy to other people the way they have been to me. I need a hug a good cry and some rest.

Since Thursday. Natalia and I have been in Essen. Germany -- the home of this year's Love walk. Today we joined millions of others in the like walk! Unfortunately. I didn't undergo the foresight of bringing my camera but others did.. here are It was an interesting day. I've never been in a displace of so many people. The streets were simply flooded. We stayed maybe 2-3 hours not more.  We're not so much into electronica drugs or alcohol.  We really enjoyed checking it out but we're more of spectators than participants! :-)

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